Goldbricker

“Working hard, or hardly working?” we say jokingly to our coworker Jan as we walk by her cubicle. She looks up from her furious typing and we smile at each other, but we both know the truth: she’s hardly working. Jan is the epitome of a goldbricker: someone who manages to appear very busy at work but somehow never seems to get that much done.

We’re not talking about an off day here. Everyone has off days. We’re talking about a pattern of behavior that has less to do with being slow and methodical about our work than it does with generally slacking off. Goldbrickers like Jan put in their requisite hours—Jan’s hardly ever late, and she almost never calls in sick—but her productivity rate pales in comparison to that of her coworkers. In fact, we’re pretty sure she spends a good five hours of every eight-hour day browsing Reddit and watching Food Network videos. Whatever she’s so busy doing all day, it sure as pie isn’t her job.

Unfortunately, goldbricking is a pretty common phenomenon. No surprise there, right? We all know at least a few Jans. But what might be surprising is the estimate that goldbrickers cost U.S. companies billions of dollars every year with their layabouting ways. Which kind of makes sense: if a company is paying us for an eight-hour day with the expectation that we’re going to help them produce or sell some good or service, and then we, like Peter in Office Space, are sitting here only doing about fifteen minutes of actual work every day, then the company’s investment in us doesn’t really seem to be paying off. But for the Jans of the world, being a goldbricker can be a pretty terrific gig.