Enter Fenton and Anne Page. FENTON
I see I cannot get thy father’s love;
Therefore no more turn me to him, sweet Nan. ANNE
Alas, how then? FENTON Why, thou must be thyself.
He doth object I am too great of birth, 5
And that, my state being galled with my expense,
I seek to heal it only by his wealth.
Besides these, other bars he lays before me—
My riots past, my wild societies—
And tells me ’tis a thing impossible 10
I should love thee but as a property. ANNE
Maybe he tells you true. FENTON
No, heaven so speed me in my time to come!
Albeit I will confess thy father’s wealth
Was the first motive that I wooed thee, Anne, 15
Yet, wooing thee, I found thee of more value
Than stamps in gold or sums in sealèd bags.
And ’tis the very riches of thyself
That now I aim at. ANNE
Gentle Master Fenton, 20
Yet seek my father’s love, still seek it, sir.
If opportunity and humblest suit
Cannot attain it, why then—hark you hither. They talk aside. | Outside Master Page's house, Anne and dreamy Fenton get cozy and talk about their future together. Fenton is bummed out that Anne's dad hates him and won't let him marry his daughter. He tells Anne that her dad doesn't like him because he thinks he's a spoiled brat who wasted all his money and wants to marry Anne because she's rich. Which, well...apparently isn't that far off. Fenton confesses that, yeah, at first, he only wanted Anne for her dough but now that he's gotten to know her, he's fallen in love. Anne encourages Fenton to take another crack at her dad, then pulls him aside as others approach. |
Enter Shallow, Slender, and Mistress Quickly. SHALLOW
Break their talk, Mistress Quickly. My kinsman
shall speak for himself. 25 SLENDER
I’ll make a shaft or a bolt on ’t. ’Slid, ’tis but
venturing. SHALLOW
Be not dismayed. SLENDER No, she shall not dismay me. I care not for
that, but that I am afeard. 30 MISTRESS QUICKLY, to Anne Hark ye, Master Slender
would speak a word with you. ANNE
I come to him. Aside. This is my father’s choice.
O, what a world of vile ill-favored faults
Looks handsome in three hundred pounds a year! 35 MISTRESS QUICKLY And how does good Master Fenton?
Pray you, a word with you. They talk aside. SHALLOW, to Slender
She’s coming. To her, coz! O
boy, thou hadst a father! SLENDER
I had a father, Mistress Anne; my uncle can 40
tell you good jests of him.—Pray you, uncle, tell
Mistress Anne the jest how my father stole two
geese out of a pen, good uncle. SHALLOW
Mistress Anne, my cousin loves you. SLENDER
Ay, that I do, as well as I love any woman in 45
Gloucestershire. SHALLOW
He will maintain you like a gentlewoman. SLENDER
Ay, that I will, come cut and longtail, under
the degree of a squire. SHALLOW
He will make you a hundred and fifty 50
pounds jointure. ANNE
Good Master Shallow, let him woo for himself. SHALLOW
Marry, I thank you for it. I thank you for that
good comfort.—She calls you, coz. I’ll leave you. He steps aside. | Just then, Slender, Shallow, and Mistress Quickly show up: Slender wants to talk to Anne. We find out that Master Page wants Anne to marry Slender because Slender's loaded. Mistress Quickly distracts Fenton as Slender tries to flirt with Anne. Slender has zero game with the ladies, so Shallow tries to help him out. He says Anne will be living large if she marries Slender. Plus, if he dies, she gets a big widow's pension. (Be still our hearts.) Anne is not impressed. She warns Shallow that he should let Slender "woo for himself." |
ANNE
Now, Master Slender. 55 SLENDER
Now, good Mistress Anne. ANNE What is your will? SLENDER
My will? ’Od’s heartlings, that’s a pretty jest
indeed! I ne’er made my will yet, I thank heaven. I
am not such a sickly creature, I give heaven praise. 60 ANNE
I mean, Master Slender, what would you with
me? SLENDER
Truly, for mine own part, I would little or
nothing with you. Your father and my uncle hath
made motions. If it be my luck, so; if not, happy 65
man be his dole. They can tell you how things go
better than I can. You may ask your father. Enter Page and Mistress Page. Here he comes. PAGE
Now, Master Slender.—Love him, daughter Anne.—
Why, how now? What does Master Fenton here? 70
You wrong me, sir, thus still to haunt my house.
I told you, sir, my daughter is disposed of. FENTON
Nay, Master Page, be not impatient. MISTRESS PAGE
Good Master Fenton, come not to my child. PAGE She is no match for you. 75 FENTON
Sir, will you hear me? PAGE
No, good Master Fenton.—
Come Master Shallow.—Come, son Slender, in.—
Knowing my mind, you wrong me, Master Fenton. Page, Shallow, and Slender exit. | Fed up, Anne confronts Slender and asks him what he wants from her. Slender says "I would little or nothing with you" (translation: he doesn't actually want anything from her), and points out that Anne's dad and his uncle are the ones who want him to marry her. See? We told you Slender's got no game. Master and Mistress Page show up get mad when they see Fenton. Master Page tells Fenton to scram and says he'll never let Anne marry him. |
MISTRESS QUICKLY, to Fenton Speak to Mistress Page. 80 FENTON
Good Mistress Page, for that I love your daughter
In such a righteous fashion as I do,
Perforce, against all checks, rebukes, and manners,
I must advance the colors of my love
And not retire. Let me have your good will. 85 ANNE
Good mother, do not marry me to yond fool. MISTRESS PAGE
I mean it not; I seek you a better husband. MISTRESS QUICKLY
That’s my master, Master Doctor. ANNE
Alas, I had rather be set quick i’ th’ earth
And bowled to death with turnips! 90 MISTRESS PAGE
Come, trouble not yourself.—Good Master Fenton,
I will not be your friend nor enemy.
My daughter will I question how she loves you,
And as I find her, so am I affected.
Till then, farewell, sir. She must needs go in; 95
Her father will be angry. FENTON
Farewell, gentle mistress.—Farewell, Nan. Mistress Page and Anne Page exit. MISTRESS QUICKLY This is my doing now. “Nay,” said I,
“will you cast away your child on a fool and a
physician? Look on Master Fenton.” This is my 100
doing. FENTON
I thank thee; and I pray thee, once tonight
Give my sweet Nan this ring. There’s for thy pains. He gives her money and a ring. MISTRESS QUICKLY
Now heaven send thee good fortune. Fenton exits. A kind heart he hath. A woman would run through 105
fire and water for such a kind heart. But yet I
would my master had Mistress Anne, or I would
Master Slender had her, or, in sooth, I would Master
Fenton had her. I will do what I can for them all
three; for so I have promised and I’ll be as good as 110
my word—but speciously for Master Fenton. Well,
I must of another errand to Sir John Falstaff from
my two mistresses. What a beast am I to slack it! She exits. | When Master Page leaves, Mistress Quickly tells Fenton to talk to Anne's mom. He does, telling her how much he loves her daughter, and Anne pipes in with "Please don't marry me off to a fool." (That would be Slender). Mistress Page says she won't. She has her eye on Doctor Caius. Anne says she'd rather be buried alive than marry that guy. Mistress Page orders Fenton to go home and takes Anne inside the house, promising to ask who she does want to marry. Mistress Quickly gives us a little aside that she likes Fenton the best, but she's still going to help out all of Anne's suitors. Because why? Oh, why not. She's probably getting money and trinkets from them all. Then Mistress Quickly runs off to relay a message to Falstaff from Mistress Ford and Mistress Page. |