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Wordiness Videos 12 videos

ACT English 2.1 Style
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ACT English: Style Drill 2, Problem 1. What's the best way to make this sentence more concise?

ACT English 2.2 Style
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ACT English: Style Drill 2, Problem 2. Which choice expresses the underlined portion most concisely?

Rephrasing the Sentence
229 Views

ACT English: Style Drill 2, Problem 3. How would you rephrase the sentence if at all?

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ACT English 1.5 Passage Drill 220 Views


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Description:

ACT English: Passage Drill 1, Problem 5. What is the best, most concise way to express the underlined portion?

Language:
English Language

Transcript

00:04

Here's your Shmoop du jour, brought to you by coconut shells. They go great with a grass skirt.

00:23

How would you correct this underlined segment from the passage, if at all?

00:27

cover that is enclosing

00:30

And here are the potential answers:

00:33

The word "that" frequently inflicts wordiness on innocent sentences.

00:36

If a sentence works without it, it's always best to leave it out.

00:40

We can eliminate choice (A) for this reason. "Cover that is enclosing" isn't the

00:46

most concise way to express this thought.

00:49

The "that" is making this poor sentence wordy when it doesn't need to be.

00:53

"That" causes problems in choice (C) as well. This choice also makes the mistake of

00:57

needlessly placing us in the future tense with the word "will."

01:01

The rest of the sentence is in the present tense, so shifting into the future tense for

01:05

no reason is inconsistent.

01:07

It's not like these coconut shells are only going to enclose coconuts on some day in the

01:11

future; they're doing it right now.

01:14

Choice (D) incorrectly makes "cover" the subject and "encloses" the verb. This sentence already

01:19

has a subject, "drupe," and a verb, "is."

01:25

All the other parts of the sentence should be working towards describing this "drupe"

01:29

and nothing else. There's no room for rival subjects and predicates here.

01:34

Choice (B) is the correct answer. For starters, it eliminates that troublemaking "that."

01:38

It also correctly applies the word "enclosing." In this form, "enclosing" is a participle,

01:44

which is a word derived from a verb that acts as an adjective by modifying a noun.

01:48

Here, the participle "enclosing" introduces a participle phrase that describes the coconut's

01:52

"hard stony cover."

01:54

But...while the coconut seems tough on the outside, inside he's a real softy

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