Salary
Average Salary: $56,380
Expected Lifetime Earnings: $2,354,000
Ha! You're adorable.
Okay, so you do get paid some money to teach at the elementary, middle school, and high school levels. But it isn't much. After all, you're doing this for the kids, remember?
As with most jobs, your salary will depend a lot on where you teach—you'll make much more in New York than you will in rural Iowa, and you'll make much more in a well-to-do private NYC school than you will teaching at one in the inner city. As you should be able to deduce, teaching at a school in inner-city Iowa would pay bupkis.
There's also the matter of pensions and benefits. Best-case scenario—if you're teaching in Silicon Valley you could be making $65,000 a year for only eight months' work (continue teaching summer school or pick up some supplementary income and your annual take could be quite nice indeed). Plus, you get $18,000 a year put into your pension and an additional $12,000 in benefits (source). No longer chump change. More like champ change.
But that's best-case scenario. In most places, you'll be making more in the $40,000-$50,000 range. You can potentially more if you have a master's degree, but considering the importance of your work and the time and effort you put into it, this salary is a pittance (source). Oh, if only we were all paid what we were worth. We wouldn't see so many Hollywood celebrities driving around in fancy cars, we can tell you that.
So fancy it doesn't even need a license plate.