Move to Germany.

Okay, fine, there are other ways. You could become a homebrewer, learn the basics, and then go to college to learn the finer points. If you go that route, major in chemistry. Or, if your school has it, food sciences. Or, if your school is UC Davis, fermentation. Nothing makes Ma and Pa prouder than a degree in fermentation.

 

Pardon me—I'm doing some very important research here. (Source)

Once you have your degree, enroll in a brewery school. The ones in the U.S. could last anywhere from two days to eighteen weeks. If that's not enough for you, and you want to be König der Bierbrauer ("King of the Brewers"), hop on the next plane to Germany, where they take their bier more seriously than a twenty-year-old frat kid with a crack shot at beer pong and deep insecurities. In Germany, you can take a three-year degree in brewing beer.

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